From J Bologna
- Your cat waits and meows at the front door when you arrive. Is it saying?
- Welcome home, I missed you.
- The phone rang twice while you were out.
- Feed me, *NOW*.
- So, I see you didn’t bring me the mate I asked for. Your pillow is history.
- Welcome home, I missed you.
- Your cat meows at the door when you go out. Is it saying?
- Please don’t leave me here all alone.
- Have a nice day.
- But what if I get hungry while you out?
- Kiss that new vase goodbye.
- Please don’t leave me here all alone.
- Your cat digs its claws in your leg. This is?
- An unsuppressed primal instinct.
- A sign of affection.
- A demand to be fed now.
- Have YOU had YOUR shots?
- An attempt to ‘fix’ you like you ‘fixed’ him.
- An unsuppressed primal instinct.
- Your cat scratches at the door after being fed. Is it saying?
- Lemme out – I need to fertilize the garden.
- Wanna go out and play?
- Wonder what they’ve got to eat next door?
- Do I mark my territory outside, or inside?
- Lemme out – I need to fertilize the garden.
- When your cat stares at you, it means:
- It is bored silly.
- It’s trying to understand how it’s food grows in cans.
- You are being sized-up for an attack.
- Human mating habits are disgusting.
- It is bored silly.
- Your cat brings a dead mouse/bird into the house. This means:
- A primal instinct is being displayed.
- You’re not feeding me enough.
- It is showing a sign of affection by sharing.
- It is demonstrating the fact that it knows how to kill; be warned.
- All of the above.
- A primal instinct is being displayed.
- Your cat displays signs it wants to mate with other cats in the neighborhood. You should:
- Let it out immediately.
- Try to switch it’s interests to other things.
- Put on heavy protective clothing if you are not planning to let it out.
- If the other cat’s owner is attractive, maybe you could double.
- Let it out immediately.
- Your cat sleeps with you; covering your face. This means:
- It is showing you great affection.
- It knows you are allergic to cats.
- It has discovered the fine art of suffocation.
- You should have let it out tonight.
- It is showing you great affection.