You’re Probably a Ched If….

  • You had a polka band instead of a string quartet at your wedding reception.
  • You own a cheese-head or necktie. And have worn it in public. At Lambeau Field or Milwaukee County Stadium.
  • You say “Ja hey dere once, eh?” more than once a day.
  • You get offended by “Sven and Olie” jokes.
  • You could polka before you could walk.
  • You went to Sheboygan for your honeymoon.
  • You have flipped off a F.I.B. more than twice in the last week.
  • Your favorite food is hotdish.
  • You flew your flag at half mast for a week after the great Oscar Meyer fire of ’91.
  • “Second Week in Deer Camp” brings a tear to your eye.
  • You do it doggie-style in winter so you and your partner can both keep watching the hockey game.
  • You know more than 17 different ways to cook brats.
  • Your mother gave you Leinie’s rather than milk in your baby bottle.
  • You have a gnome or a bathroom appliance in your front yard.
  • You get withdrawal symptoms after three days without green jello.
  • You have ever tipped a cow. When sober.
  • You have ever eaten an entire Hillshire Farms Christmas gift pack in one sitting.
  • You drink from a bubbler.
  • You have ever bowled more than 10 consecutive games.
  • You have memorized every line from “Strange Brew.”
  • You appeared at Lambeau field wearing only a g-string and green paint.
  • You are related to the National Sheepshead Champion.
  • Your family pet is named “Bossie”.
  • You have ever had a date with Ms. Dairyland 20xx.
  • You had your wedding reception at a bowling alley.
  • You own the CD of “25 Great Accordian Hits”. And can play along with it.
  • Laverne and Shirley are your all-time heros.
  • You have ever been mistaken for a Yooper.
  • You seldom can remember the week after Oktoberfest.
  • You considered suicide after Paul Molitor got traded.
  • You have ever worn a bowling shirt with your name embroidered on it to church.
  • You have ever spent more than 72 consecutive hours in an ice-fishing hut.
  • You have ordered pizza with sauerkraut on it (more than once.)