- If you see a bee, RUN!
- Avoid being abducted by aliens at all costs
- Never expect an informant to stick around for long
- Avoid people dressed in black
- Glow-in-the-dark bugs are bad
- Freaky worm mutants that live in sewers are bad
- Protect your liver from mutant liver-eating men
- Protect your pituitary gland from mutant pituitary gland-eating men
- Protect your fat from mutant fat-eating men
- Always check rocks for gooey alien black oil
- Make sure your local PTA is demon-free
- Avoid people with gargoyle fetishes
- Don’t bring your pet when you go lake monster hunting
- Don’t smoke
- Don’t get a red tattoo
- Don’t drill holes in your head
- Red eyes are a bad sign
- If you feel yourself being ‘drawn’ somewhere, in short – don’t go
- The truth *is* out there…somewhere
- If it’s iced tea, it could be love, but if it’s root beer, it’s fate.
- Never leave home without your Superduper Alien-Bounty-Hunter-Killing Fffftttt Stiletto Needle Thing Weapon thing
- Cable T.V. can be linked to strange behavior – Trust me, I know
error: Content is protected !!