Marketing Slogans for Viagra

  • This is your penis. This is your penis on drugs. Any questions?
  • Viagra, The quicker dicker upper
  • Viagra, One-a-day, like iron
  • Viagra, When it absolutely, positively has to be there tonight
  • Viagra, Home of the whopper
  • Viagra, It plumps when you take ’em
  • Viagra, Strong enough for a man, but made for a woman
  • Viagra, Tastes great, more filling
  • Viagra, Ten inches long … and growing.
  • Viagra, We work harder, so you don’t have to.

Hidden Meanings in Commercial Slogans

  • “A diamond is forever.”
    “Which is *exactly* how long you’ll be hearing about it from the wife if you don’t cough up the green for some ice, pal.”
  • “Built Ford tough”
    “It’s an American version of tough; not *really* tough, like German cars are tough.”
  • “I can’t believe it’s not butter!”
    “Being around Fabio, for even a few seconds, makes you dumb as a post.”
  • “Pork; the other white meat”
    “When Heston starts screaming that it’s people, don’t say we didn’t warn you.”
  • “An Army of one”
    “Can’t be gay all by yourself, can ya?”
  • “A diamond says you’d marry her all over again”
    “You’re too classy for a $50 hooker every week.”
  • “Have it your way”
    “Think of us as your personal hamburger whore.”
  • “Just Do It”
    “We know you’ll never get off the couch lard-ass; just buy the friggin’ shoes.”
  • “The new way to office”
    “The half-assed way to slogan.”
  • “It’s so chunky, you’ll be tempted to eat it with a fork.”
    “Those damn slicing machines are still dumping way too many body parts in our soups!”
  • “Must-see TV”
    “Yeah, what else are you gonna do, Shakespeare? Read?!”
  • “Calgon, take me away!”
    “I’ve got my Mr. Showerhead poised for action.”
  • “Like a rock”
    “God knows we weren’t selling many pickups with that Boy George tune.”

Slogans that Never Quite Caught On

  • Charmin: “Butt… Wipe… Err.”
  • Microsoft: “How much are you going to pay today?”
  • Eggs: “The Incredible Edible Ovum.”
  • MTV: “Loud and easy to spell.”
  • Saks 5th Avenue: “You Could Shop Here if You’re Poor, But That Would be Stupid!”
  • Iguana: “The other green meat.”
  • Penis Enlargement Specialists: “It Don’t Mean a Thing If It Ain’t Got That Swing!”
  • Nike: “Just buy the damn shoes, you flabby spineless lump!”
  • Daisy Air Rifles: “Keeping kids off your lawn for over forty years.”
  • Canon Photocopiers: “Quit calling them Xeroxes, dammit!”
  • Pepto Bismol: “Squash the Squirts!”
  • Trojans: “Just add meat.”
  • Apple MacIntosh: “Hey, we thought of it first!”
  • Radio Shack: “You’ve got questions, we’ve got geek losers!”
  • Professional Bowling on NBC: “Oh, why don’t you just go ahead and kill yourself instead?”