Slogans that Never Quite Caught On

  • Charmin: “Butt… Wipe… Err.”
  • Microsoft: “How much are you going to pay today?”
  • Eggs: “The Incredible Edible Ovum.”
  • MTV: “Loud and easy to spell.”
  • Saks 5th Avenue: “You Could Shop Here if You’re Poor, But That Would be Stupid!”
  • Iguana: “The other green meat.”
  • Penis Enlargement Specialists: “It Don’t Mean a Thing If It Ain’t Got That Swing!”
  • Nike: “Just buy the damn shoes, you flabby spineless lump!”
  • Daisy Air Rifles: “Keeping kids off your lawn for over forty years.”
  • Canon Photocopiers: “Quit calling them Xeroxes, dammit!”
  • Pepto Bismol: “Squash the Squirts!”
  • Trojans: “Just add meat.”
  • Apple MacIntosh: “Hey, we thought of it first!”
  • Radio Shack: “You’ve got questions, we’ve got geek losers!”
  • Professional Bowling on NBC: “Oh, why don’t you just go ahead and kill yourself instead?”