English Education at its Finest

Following questions and answers were collated from recent British GCSE exams (16 year olds)!

  • Earth Science

    • Q: Name the four seasons.
      A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
    • Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink.
      A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.
    • Q: How is dew formed?
      A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.
    • Q: What is a planet?
      A: A body of earth surrounded by sky.
  • Sociology

    • Q: What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on?
      A: If you are buying a house, they will insist you are well endowed.
    • Q: In a democratic society, how important are elections?
      A: Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election.
  • Biology

    • Q: What happens to your body as you age?
      A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.
    • Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
      A: He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.
    • Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
      A: Premature death.
    • Q: What is artificial insemination?
      A: When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow.
    • Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?
      A: Keep it in the cow.
    • Q: What is the most common form of birth control?
      A: Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium.
    • Q: Give the meaning of the term Caesarean Section.
      A: The caesarean section is a district in Rome.
    • Q: What is a terminal illness?
      A: When you are sick at the airport
  • Technology

    • Q: What is a turbine?
      A: Something an Arab wears on his head.
  • Religious Education

    • Q: What is a Hindu?
      A: It lays eggs.