- The gift of a free membership to Weight Watchers
- The “Monica gift set” including a cigar, beret, and stain remover
- A ride-on vacuum cleaner — especially when she is expecting her favorite perfume.
- A free consultation with Dr. Kevorkian
- A Solar powered flashlight
- A voucher for a free pap smear
- A ten dollar gift certificate to McDonalds
- Membership in Fruitcake of the Month club
- The same lousy present that they gave you last year that you never opened and didn’t know how to get rid of it.
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