If College Students Wrote the Holy Bible

The Holy Scripture may have had a different bent if written by college students:

  • The Last Supper would have been eaten the next morning – cold, with stale Coke.
  • The Ten Commandments would actually be only five – double-spaced, with wide margins, and written in a large font.
  • A new edition would be published every two years in order to limit reselling.
  • Forbidden fruit would have been eaten because it wasn’t cafeteria food.
  • Paul’s letter to the Romans would become Paul’s e-mail to abuse@romans.gov.
  • Reason Cain killed Abel: They were roommates.
  • Reason why Moses and followers walked in the desert for 40 years: They didn’t want to ask for directions and look like freshmen.
  • Instead of God creating the world in six days and resting on the seventh, he would have put it off until the night before it was due and then pulled an all-nighter.