- In primitive society, when native tribes beat the ground with clubs and yelled, it was called witchcraft; today, in civilized society, it is called golf.
- Golf is an expensive way of playing marbles.
- Golf is a game in which the slowest people in the world are those in front of you, and the fastest are those behind.
- Golf: A five mile walk punctuated with disappointments.
- The secret of good golf is to hit the ball hard, straight and not too often.
- There’s no game like golf: you go out with three friends, play eighteen holes, and return with three enemies.
- Golf was once a rich man’s sport, but now it has millions of poor players.
- An amateur golfer is one who addresses the ball twice: once before swinging, and once again after swinging.
- Many a golfer prefers a golf cart to a caddy because the cart cannot count, criticize or laugh.
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