Church Observations | The Joke Archives

Some people are kind, polite, and sweet-spirited until you try to get into their pews or their favorite church parking spot.
Many folks want to serve God, but only as advisers.
It is easier to preach ten sermons than it is to live one.
We were called to be witnesses, not lawyers.
When you get to your wit’s end, you’ll find God lives there.
People are funny. They want the front of the bus, middle of the road, and the back of the church.
Opportunity may knock once, but temptation bangs on your door for years.
Quit griping about your church; if it was perfect, you couldn’t belong.
The phrase that is guaranteed to wake up an audience: “And in conclusion.”
If the church wants a better pastor, it only needs to pray for the one it has.
Not only are the sins of the fathers visited upon the children, but nowadays the sins of the children are visited upon the fathers.
God Himself does not propose to judge a man till he’s dead. So why should you?
To make a long story short, don’t tell it.
If your left hand doesn’t know what your right one is doing, you should consider running for a job in Washington.
Some minds are like concrete, thoroughly mixed up and permanently set.
I don’t know why some people change churches. What difference does it make which one you stay home from?
A lot of church members are singing “Standing on the Promises” while they are just sitting on the premises.