Signs the Millennium Hype Has Gone Too Far

  • “2001 Dalmatians” just seems like overkill.
  • National Park Service just paid a consultant six figures to get Old Faithful Y2K compliant.
  • Dick Clark refuses to do the New Year’s show without a bazooka and a vat of boiling oil.
  • Millions converting to Judaism so this year is actually 5760 and they can skip all this nonsense.
  • New Charmin Y2Ply!
  • They’re printing new calendars and everything!
  • Safeway already advertising “January 2 Carnage-in-the-Streets Canned Food Sale.”
  • When people finally stoop to “Spam Hoarding”, everyone just stops and has a good long laugh.
  • You just saw an ad for Y2K-compliant pants.
  • Tired of talking about Y2K, the press begins to freak everyone outabout the upcoming “Groundhog Day Bug.”
  • You evicted your roommate so you’d have more space to store Vienna sausages.
  • Freeze-dried meals? Check. Bottled water? Check. Guns and ammo? Check. Frozen sperm for re-populating the world with my seed? Still working on it.