Cool Things About Having a Beer Belly

  • You’re less likely to be pestered by annoying sorority girls.
  • It doubles as a convenient TV tray for nachos and beer.
  • It’s a great way to meet cute female cardiologists.
  • Extra gravity makes it that much less likely you’ll ever be thrown free of the earth into deep space.
  • Your bellybutton can store up to eight quarters for the parking meter.
  • And finally, the COOLEST thing about having a beer belly:

  • YOU CAN DRINK LOTSA BEER!!!