Martha Stewart is Stalking Your Dog If…

  • There’s potpourri hanging from his/her collar.
  • The dog’s nails have been cut with pinking shears.
  • The dog toys are all stored in McCoy crocks.
  • The pooper scooper has been decorated with raffia.
  • That telltale lemon slice in the new silver waterbowl.
  • You find liver and whole wheat dog treats stamped out with copper cookie cutters and decorated with royal icing using a #2 rosette tip.
  • Dog hair has been collected and put into wire baskets for nesting material for the birds.
  • A seasonally appropriate grapevine wreath adorns the front of your dog’s crate.
  • Your dog goes outside naked and comes in wearing a thyme colored virgin wool handknitted sweater with matching boots.
  • The dog droppings in your backyard have been sculpted into swans.