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Windbreakers Categorized

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• The Vain Person: One who loves the smell of his own farts.
• The Amiable Person: One who loves the smell of other peoples farts.
• The Proud Person: One who thinks hisfarts are exceptionally fine.
• The Shy Person: One who releases silent farts and then blushes.
• The Impudent Person: One who farts loudly and then laughs.
• The Scientific Person: One who farts regularly but is truly concerned about air pollution.
• The Unfortunate Person: One who tries awfully hard to fart but shits instead.
• The Nervous Person: One who stops in the middle of a fart.
• The Honest Person: One who admits he farted but offers a medical reason for it.
• The Dishonest Person: One who farts and then blames the dog.
• The Foolish Person: One who suppresses a fart for hours and hours.
• The Thrifty Person: One who always has several farts in reserve.
• The Antisocial Person: One who excuses himself and farts in complete privacy.
• The Strategic Person: One who conceals his farts with loud laughter.
• The Sadistic Person: One who farts in bed and then fluffs the bedcovers over his bed mates head.
• The Intellectual Person: One who determines from the smell of his neighbor’s fart precisely the latest food item he consumed.
• The Athletic Person: One who farts at the slightest exertion.
• The Miserable Person: One who would truly love to but can’t fart at all.
• The Sensitive Person: One who farts and then bursts into tears.
• The Bruiser: One who farts so hard and loud that he bruises his butt cheeks.