Once there was a guy wandering through the desert. he was starved and very thirsty so he was very excited when he saw this huge house out of nowhere. He walked up and rang the doorbell. After a couple of rings an old Chinese guy answered. The starved man begged him for a meal and some shelter. The Old man said that he could stay as long as he needed to, but there was one exception the old man said, “You can not touch my daughter. If you do you will experience the 3 worst Chinese tortures.”
The man, being very hungry and tired, quickly agreed. “How good looking can she be if she lives out in the middle of nowhere,” he thought. That night at dinner he saw the old man’s daughter for the first time. She was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen in his life. He tried not to stare at her but he couldn’t help it. After dinner she handed him a note that said “Meet me in my room at midnight.”
That night after the old man had gone to sleep he went into the beautiful daughter’s room. She gave him the best sex of his life. The next morning he woke up in bed with a huge rock next to him. On the rock it said “1st worst Chinese torture.” He didn’t know how it got there but he wanted to get rid of it.
He picked it up, walked over to the window and threw it out. Just then he saw a note on the window sill. It read “2nd worst Chinese torture: left testicle tied to rock.”
Knowing this he jumped out after the rock. While falling he got close enough to the rock to see another sign on it. The sign read “3rd worst Chinese torture: right testicle tied to bed post.”