Sayings of Biblical Mothers

  • SAMSON! Get your hand out of that lion. You don’t know where it’s been!
  • DAVID! I told you not to play in the house with that sling! Go practice your harp. We pay good money for those lessons!
  • ABRAHAM! Stop wandering around the countryside and get home for supper!
  • SHADRACH, MESHACH AND ABEDNEGO! Leave those clothes outside, you smell like a dirty ol’ furnace!
  • CAIN! Get off your brother! You’re going to kill him some day!
  • NOAH! No, you can’t keep them! I told you, don’t bring home any more strays!
  • GIDEON! Have you been hiding in that wine press again? Look at your clothes!
  • JAMES AND JOHN! No more burping contests at the dinner table, please. People are going to call you the sons of thunder!
  • JUDAS! Have you been in my purse again?!