{"id":940,"date":"2014-12-26T12:30:40","date_gmt":"2014-12-26T10:30:40","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/fun\/?p=940"},"modified":"2014-12-26T12:30:40","modified_gmt":"2014-12-26T10:30:40","slug":"online-lies","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=940","title":{"rendered":"Online Lies"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li>&#8220;I&#8217;m in this private room consoling a depressed friend.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>&#8220;You&#8217;re different. I&#8217;ve never felt like this about someone I&#8217;ve never met before.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>&#8220;I&#8217;m new online and haven&#8217;t had time to create a profile, but tell me more about yourself.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>&#8220;I never do cybersex!! Yet here in this room alone with you, well, I&#8217;m getting excited!&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>&#8220;Yes of course I&#8217;m female.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>&#8220;No this is my only screen name. You mean you can have more than one?&#8221;<\/li>\n<p><li>&#8220;I&#8217;m 5&#8217;4, blonde hair, blue eyes and guys love my body!&#8221;<br \/>\nMale version is &#8220;I&#8217;m 6&#8217;0, great tan, and buffed from working out!&#8221;<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<li>&#8220;I&#8217;m not like most of the guys here, I just want to meet so we can just have coffee and get to know each other.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>&#8220;I don&#8217;t care what you look like, it&#8217;s what&#8217;s on the inside that counts.&#8221; (Which is true, except it means &#8220;I&#8217;m horny and could care less, just type)<\/li>\n<li>&#8220;Tonight my love, our souls have touched.&#8221;<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&#8220;I&#8217;m in this private room consoling a depressed friend.&#8221; &#8220;You&#8217;re different. I&#8217;ve never felt like this about someone I&#8217;ve never met before.&#8221; &#8220;I&#8217;m new online and haven&#8217;t had time to create a profile, but tell me more about yourself.&#8221; &#8220;I never do cybersex!! Yet here in this room alone with you, well, I&#8217;m getting excited!&#8221; [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[14],"tags":[406,1100],"class_list":["post-940","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-computers","tag-computer","tag-online-lies"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/940","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=940"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/940\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=940"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=940"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=940"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}