{"id":917,"date":"2014-12-25T22:09:16","date_gmt":"2014-12-25T20:09:16","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/fun\/?p=917"},"modified":"2014-12-25T22:09:16","modified_gmt":"2014-12-25T20:09:16","slug":"losing-my-connection","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=917","title":{"rendered":"Losing My Connection"},"content":{"rendered":"<div align=\"center\">by Alan Zacher<br \/>\nto the tune of Losing My Religion<br \/>\n(Apologies to REM)<\/div>\n<p>Windoze is bigger<br \/>\nIt&#8217;s bigger than Earth<br \/>\nBut not quite as big as<br \/>\nThe things that I must do now<br \/>\nTo upgrade all my stuff<br \/>\nOh no I need more RAM<br \/>\nI set it up<\/p>\n<p>That&#8217;s me in the corner<br \/>\nThat&#8217;s me on the help line<br \/>\nLosing my connection<br \/>\nTrying to keep up with Linux<br \/>\nAnd I don&#8217;t know if I can do it<br \/>\nOh no I need more RAM<br \/>\nI haven&#8217;t bought enough<br \/>\nI thought that I heard you laughing<br \/>\nI thought that I heard you Ping!<br \/>\nI think I thought I saw a GPF<\/p>\n<p>Every nightmare<br \/>\nOf velour vest wearing Borg, I&#8217;m<br \/>\nPurchasing new hardware<br \/>\nTrying to cool my CPU<br \/>\nLike a Pentium that become a 286<br \/>\nOh no I need more RAM<br \/>\nResistance is futile.<\/p>\n<p>Consider this<br \/>\nThe OS of the century<br \/>\nConsider this<br \/>\nThe OS that brought me<br \/>\nTo my knees failed<br \/>\nNow all these open apps have<br \/>\nCome crashing down<br \/>\nNow I need more RAM<br \/>\nI thought that I heard you laughing<br \/>\nI thought that I heard you Ping!<br \/>\nI think I thought I saw a GPF<\/p>\n<p>But that was just a dream<\/p>\n<p>I hope that was a dream&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>by Alan Zacher to the tune of Losing My Religion (Apologies to REM) Windoze is bigger It&#8217;s bigger than Earth But not quite as big as The things that I must do now To upgrade all my stuff Oh no I need more RAM I set it up That&#8217;s me in the corner That&#8217;s me [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"wpmdr_menu":1,"wpmdr_menu_extended":{"individualPostRemove":1,"individualPostRemoveDate":1,"individualPostRemoveAuthor":1,"individualPostYoastRemovePublished":1,"individualPostYoastRemoveModified":1},"footnotes":""},"categories":[14],"tags":[406,850,1337],"class_list":["post-917","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-computers","tag-computer","tag-internet-connection","tag-song"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/917","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=917"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/917\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=917"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=917"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=917"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}