{"id":913,"date":"2014-12-25T22:04:11","date_gmt":"2014-12-25T20:04:11","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/fun\/?p=913"},"modified":"2014-12-25T22:04:11","modified_gmt":"2014-12-25T20:04:11","slug":"if-only-life-could-be-like-a-computer","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=913","title":{"rendered":"If Only Life Could Be Like A Computer&#8230;"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li>If you messed up your life, you could press &#8220;Ctrl, Alt, Delete&#8221; and start all over!<\/li>\n<li>To get your daily exercise, just click on &#8220;run&#8221;! If you needed a break from life, click on suspend.<\/li>\n<li>Hit &#8220;any key&#8221; to continue life when ready.<\/li>\n<li>To get even with the neighbors, turn up the sound blaster.<\/li>\n<li>To add\/remove someone in your life, click settings and control panel.<\/li>\n<li>To improve your appearance, just adjust the display settings.<\/li>\n<li>If life gets too noisy, turn off the speakers.<\/li>\n<li>When you loose your car keys, click on find.<\/li>\n<li>&#8220;Help&#8221; with the chores is just a click away.<\/li>\n<li>Auto insurance wouldn&#8217;t be necessary. You would use your diskette to recover from a crash.<\/li>\n<li>And, we could click on &#8220;SEND NOW&#8221; and a Pizza would be on it&#8217;s way to YOU&#8230;<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>If you messed up your life, you could press &#8220;Ctrl, Alt, Delete&#8221; and start all over! To get your daily exercise, just click on &#8220;run&#8221;! If you needed a break from life, click on suspend. Hit &#8220;any key&#8221; to continue life when ready. To get even with the neighbors, turn up the sound blaster. To [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"wpmdr_menu":1,"wpmdr_menu_extended":{"individualPostRemove":1,"individualPostRemoveDate":1,"individualPostRemoveAuthor":1,"individualPostYoastRemovePublished":1,"individualPostYoastRemoveModified":1},"footnotes":""},"categories":[14],"tags":[406,918],"class_list":["post-913","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-computers","tag-computer","tag-life"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/913","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=913"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/913\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=913"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=913"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=913"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}