{"id":77,"date":"2014-12-21T12:16:50","date_gmt":"2014-12-21T12:16:50","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/fun\/?p=77"},"modified":"2014-12-21T12:16:50","modified_gmt":"2014-12-21T12:16:50","slug":"all-i-need-to-know-about-life-i-learned-from-a-cow","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=77","title":{"rendered":"All I Need to Know About Life I Learned from a Cow"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li>Wake up in a happy mooo-d.<\/li>\n<li>Don&#8217;t cry over spilled milk.<\/li>\n<li>When chewing your cud, remember: There&#8217;s no fat, no calories, no cholesterol, and no taste!<\/li>\n<li>The grass is green on the other side of the fence.<\/li>\n<li>Turn the udder cheek and mooo-ve on.<\/li>\n<li>Seize every opportunity and milk it for all its worth!<\/li>\n<li>It&#8217;s better to be seen and not herd.<\/li>\n<li>Honor thy fodder and thy mother and all your udder relatives.<\/li>\n<li>Never take any bull from anybody.<\/li>\n<li>Always let them know who&#8217;s the bossy.<\/li>\n<li>Stepping on cowpies brings good luck.<\/li>\n<li>Black and white is always an appropriate fashion statement.<\/li>\n<li>Don&#8217;t forget to cow-nt your blessings every day.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Wake up in a happy mooo-d. Don&#8217;t cry over spilled milk. When chewing your cud, remember: There&#8217;s no fat, no calories, no cholesterol, and no taste! The grass is green on the other side of the fence. Turn the udder cheek and mooo-ve on. Seize every opportunity and milk it for all its worth! It&#8217;s [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[128,450,924],"class_list":["post-77","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-all-i-need","tag-all-i-need","tag-cow","tag-lists"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/77","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=77"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/77\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=77"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=77"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=77"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}