{"id":612,"date":"2014-12-23T14:46:48","date_gmt":"2014-12-23T12:46:48","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/fun\/?p=612"},"modified":"2014-12-23T14:46:48","modified_gmt":"2014-12-23T12:46:48","slug":"elementary-school-excuses","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=612","title":{"rendered":"Elementary School Excuses"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li>&#8220;Jerry was at his grandmother&#8217;s yesterday, and she did not bring him to school because Jerry couldn&#8217;t remember where the school was.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>&#8220;Ronnie would not finish his work last night. He said his brain was too tired of spelling.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>&#8220;Eric hurt his knee in a karate tournament over the weekend. He won his age group, but was in too much pain to do his math assignment.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>&#8220;Amy did not do her homework last night because we went out to a party and did not get home until late. If she is tired, please let her sleep during recess time.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>&#8220;Henry stayed home because he had a stomach ache from eating too much frosting.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>&#8220;It was my fault Mike did not do his math homework last night. His pencil broke and we do not have a pencil sharpener at home.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>&#8220;Scott didn&#8217;t practice last night because he lost his tooth in the mouthpiece of his trumpet.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>&#8220;Diane was late on Wednesday. She fell asleep on the bus and was taken back to the bus yard.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>&#8220;Cody was absent yesterday because we were out bowling until 2am.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>&#8220;Tommy wasn&#8217;t in school yesterday because he thought it was Saturday.&#8221;<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&#8220;Jerry was at his grandmother&#8217;s yesterday, and she did not bring him to school because Jerry couldn&#8217;t remember where the school was.&#8221; &#8220;Ronnie would not finish his work last night. He said his brain was too tired of spelling.&#8221; &#8220;Eric hurt his knee in a karate tournament over the weekend. He won his age group, [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[13],"tags":[610,1289],"class_list":["post-612","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-collegeschool","tag-excuse","tag-school"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/612","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=612"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/612\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=612"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=612"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=612"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}