{"id":4236,"date":"2015-03-08T15:30:44","date_gmt":"2015-03-08T13:30:44","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/?p=4236"},"modified":"2015-03-08T15:30:44","modified_gmt":"2015-03-08T13:30:44","slug":"white-house-valentine-poems","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=4236","title":{"rendered":"White House Valentine Poems"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li>After years of indiscretion,<br \/>\nat last I&#8217;ve come to learn,<br \/>\nthat I must send this Valentine,<br \/>\nTo Whom it May Concern.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Valentine, I think you&#8217;re great,<br \/>\na Chief Executive who can delegate.<br \/>\nAnd you warm this First Lady&#8217;s heart,<br \/>\nby having interns do the unpleasant part.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>On most every day,<br \/>\nI like McDonald&#8217;s fries.<br \/>\nOn Valentine&#8217;s Day,<br \/>\nI prefer Monica&#8217;s thighs &#8212; Super Sized! <\/li>\n<\/p>\n<li>Will you deny, Valentine? <\/li>\n<p>Hey, Big Creep, on Valentine&#8217;s Day,<br \/>\nwe&#8217;ll play Marilyn and JFK.<br \/>\nJust make sure that Hillary&#8217;s gone,<br \/>\n&#8217;cause you get me interned on! <\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>How do I love thee?<br \/>\nLet me count the entries in the visitors&#8217; log. <\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Monica, Monica, quiet young mouse<br \/>\n&#8212; taking her Bill to the floor of the House. <\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Hi there! Happy Valentine&#8217;s day!<br \/>\nSorry to serve your subpoena this way. <\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Roses are red,<br \/>\nthen they turn gray,<br \/>\nMy heart goes pitter-pat<br \/>\nwhen you wear that beret. <\/li>\n<\/p>\n<li>Shall I compare thee to my high school drama teacher? <\/li>\n<p><li>Twinkle, twinkle, Kenneth Starr,<br \/>\nI talked to Vernon in the car.<br \/>\nI promised him my lips are sealed,<br \/>\nbut I&#8217;ll change my mind, for a sweet book deal. <\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>As soon as I&#8217;m finished bombing Iraq,<br \/>\n  I&#8217;d like to get you in the sack. <\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Will you,on the night in question of February 14th,<br \/>\nbe my Valentine? <\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Violets are blue,<br \/>\nroses are thorny.<br \/>\nAll hell breaks loose,<br \/>\nwhen Bubba gets horny.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>I&#8217;ll bomb England, I&#8217;ll bomb France,<br \/>\nIf you&#8217;ll remove my underpants.<\/li><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>After years of indiscretion, at last I&#8217;ve come to learn, that I must send this Valentine, To Whom it May Concern. Valentine, I think you&#8217;re great, a Chief Executive who can delegate. And you warm this First Lady&#8217;s heart, by having interns do the unpleasant part. On most every day, I like McDonald&#8217;s fries. On [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[47,54],"tags":[1488],"class_list":["post-4236","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-politics","category-season","tag-valentines-day"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4236","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=4236"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4236\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=4236"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=4236"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=4236"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}