Twas the night before Christmas,
\nDa whole house was mella,
\nNot a creature was stirrin’,
\nCuz I had a gun unda da pilla.<\/p>\n
When up on da roof
\nI heard somethin’ pound,
\nI sprung to da window,
\nTo scream, “YO! Keep it down!”<\/p>\n
When what to my
\nWanderin’ eyes should appear,
\nBut da Don of all elfs,
\nAnd eight friggin’ reindeer!<\/p>\n
Wit’ slicked back black hair,
\nAnd a silk red suit,
\ndon Christopher wuz here,
\nAnd he brought da loot!<\/p>\n
Wit’ a slap to dare snouts,
\nAnd a yank on dare manes,
\nHe cursed and he shouted,
\nAnd he called dem by name.<\/p>\n
“Yo Tony, Yo Frankie,
\n Yo Vinny, Yo Vito,
\n Ay Joey, Ay Paulie,
\n Ay Pepe, Ay Guido!”<\/p>\n
As I drew out my gun
\nAnd hid by da bed,
\nHe flew troo da winda
\nAnd slapped me ‘side da head.<\/p>\n
“What da hell you doin’
\nPullin’ a gun on da Don?
\nNow all you’re gettin’ is coal,
\nYou friggin’ moron!”<\/p>\n
Den pointin’ a fat finga
\nRight unda my nose,
\nHe twisted his pinky ring,
\nAnd up da chimney he rose.<\/p>\n
He sprang to his sleigh,
\nObscenities screamin’,
\nAway dey all flew,
\nBefore he troo dem a beatin’.<\/p>\n
Den I heard him yell out,
\nWhat I did least expect,
\n“Merry Friggin’ Christmas to all,
\nAnd yous better show some respect!”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Twas the night before Christmas, Da whole house was mella, Not a creature was stirrin’, Cuz I had a gun unda da pilla. When up on da roof I heard somethin’ pound, I sprung to da window, To scream, “YO! Keep it down!” When what to my Wanderin’ eyes should appear, But da Don of […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[64],"tags":[370,860],"class_list":["post-4222","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-twas","tag-christmas","tag-italian"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4222","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=4222"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4222\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=4222"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=4222"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=4222"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}