{"id":3969,"date":"2015-02-22T15:20:54","date_gmt":"2015-02-22T13:20:54","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/?p=3969"},"modified":"2015-02-22T15:20:54","modified_gmt":"2015-02-22T13:20:54","slug":"the-end-of-the-world","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=3969","title":{"rendered":"The End of the World"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>The panicky world learns that a giant meteor will crash on earth&#8217;s surface in 10 days and end it all. Reaction?<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Roman Catholics: converge on Rome for solemn papal prayers.<\/li>\n<li>Episcopalians: stage one last party before the end.<\/li>\n<li>Lutherans: &#8220;ein deutsches Bierfest&#8221; for the same reason.<\/li>\n<li>Baptists: hold biggest revival in history for one last attempt to turn the whole world Baptist before the end, whether the world wants to or not.<\/li>\n<li>Methodists: organize small groups for heart-burning prayer and testimony.<\/li>\n<li>Quakers: sit quietly and await the end.<\/li>\n<li>Mormons: plunge into the Great Salt Lake in earth&#8217;s biggest baptism-by-proxy ceremony.<\/li>\n<li>Presbyterians: appoint a committee to make a thorough study of the entire situation.<\/li>\n<li>United Church: commission a study booklet so all the congregations can discuss the issue. They are to report back in two years.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The panicky world learns that a giant meteor will crash on earth&#8217;s surface in 10 days and end it all. Reaction? Roman Catholics: converge on Rome for solemn papal prayers. Episcopalians: stage one last party before the end. Lutherans: &#8220;ein deutsches Bierfest&#8221; for the same reason. Baptists: hold biggest revival in history for one last [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[55],"tags":[155],"class_list":["post-3969","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-spirit","tag-armageddon"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3969","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3969"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3969\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3969"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3969"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3969"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}