{"id":3684,"date":"2015-02-06T11:06:41","date_gmt":"2015-02-06T09:06:41","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/?p=3684"},"modified":"2015-02-06T11:06:41","modified_gmt":"2015-02-06T09:06:41","slug":"but-first","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=3684","title":{"rendered":"But First&#8230;"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I have recently been diagnosed with AAADD &#8211; Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder. This is how it goes&#8230;<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>I decide to do work on the car, I start to the garage and notice the mail on the table. OK, I&#8217;m going to work on the car&#8230; BUT FIRST&#8230;<\/li>\n<li>I&#8217;m going to go through the mail. Lay car keys down on desk. After discarding the junk mail, I notice the trash can is full. OK, I&#8217;ll just put the bills on my desk&#8230;. BUT FIRST&#8230;<\/li>\n<li>I&#8217;ll take the trash out, but since I&#8217;m going to be near the mailbox, I&#8217;ll address a few bills&#8230;. Yes. Now, where is the checkbook? Oops.. there&#8217;s only one check left.  Where did I put the extra checks? Oh,  there is my empty plastic cup from last night on my desk. I&#8217;m going to look for those checks&#8230; BUT FIRST&#8230;<\/li>\n<p><li>I need to put the cup back in the kitchen. I head for the kitchen, look out the window, notice the flowers need a drink of water, I put the cup on the counter and there&#8217;s my extra pair of glasses on the kitchen counter. What are they doing here? I&#8217;ll just put them away&#8230; BUT<br \/>\nFIRST&#8230;<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<li>I need to water those plants. I head for the door and&#8230; Aaaagh! someone left the TV remote in the wrong spot. Okay, I&#8217;ll put the remote away and water the plants&#8230; BUT FIRST&#8230;<\/li>\n<li>I need to find those checks.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>END OF DAY: Oil in car not changed, bills still unpaid, cup still in the sink, checkbook still has only one check left, lost my car keys,&#8230; And, when I try to figure out how come nothing got done today, I&#8217;m baffled because&#8230; I KNOW I WAS BUSY ALL DAY! I realize this condition<br \/>\nis serious&#8230; I&#8217;d get help&#8230; BUT FIRST&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>I think I&#8217;ll check my e-mail.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I have recently been diagnosed with AAADD &#8211; Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder. This is how it goes&#8230; I decide to do work on the car, I start to the garage and notice the mail on the table. OK, I&#8217;m going to work on the car&#8230; BUT FIRST&#8230; I&#8217;m going to go through the mail. [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2,35],"tags":[1198],"class_list":["post-3684","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-aging","category-medical","tag-procrastination"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3684","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3684"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3684\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3684"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3684"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3684"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}