{"id":3579,"date":"2015-01-25T19:25:04","date_gmt":"2015-01-25T17:25:04","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/?p=3579"},"modified":"2015-01-25T19:25:04","modified_gmt":"2015-01-25T17:25:04","slug":"you-know-youre-in-phoenix-when","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=3579","title":{"rendered":"You Know You&#8217;re In Phoenix When&#8230;"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li>You buy salsa by the gallon.<\/li>\n<li>Your Christmas decorations includes a half a yard of sand and l00 paper bags.<\/li>\n<li>You think a red light is merely a suggestion.<\/li>\n<li>All of your out-of-state friends start to visit after October but clear out come the end of April.<\/li>\n<li>You think someone driving wearing oven mitts is clever.<\/li>\n<li>Most of the restaurants in town have the first name &#8220;El&#8221; or &#8220;Los&#8221;.<\/li>\n<li>You think 6 tons of crushed rock makes a beautiful yard.<\/li>\n<li>You&#8217;ve signed so many petitions to recall governors that you can&#8217;t remember the name of the incumbent.<\/li>\n<li>Your house is made of stucco and has a red clay tile roof.<\/li>\n<li>You can say Hohokam and people don&#8217;t think you&#8217;re laughing funny.<\/li>\n<li>You see more irrigation water on the street than there is in the Salt River.<\/li>\n<li>Every other vehicle is a 4&#215;4.<\/li>\n<li>Vehicles with open windows have the right-of-way in the summer.<\/li>\n<li>People break out coats when temperature drops below 70.<\/li>\n<li>The pool can be warmer than you are.<\/li>\n<li>Most homes have more firearms than people.<\/li>\n<li>Kids will ask, &#8220;What&#8217;s a mosquito?&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>People with black cars or have black upholstery in their car are automatically assumed to be from out-of-state or nuts.<\/li>\n<li>The AC Service Man is on your list of best friends.<\/li>\n<li>Monday Night Football starts at 7:00 instead of 6:00.<\/li>\n<li>You can finish a Big Gulp in 10 minutes and go back for seconds.<\/li>\n<li>The water from the cold water tap is the same temperature as the hot one.<\/li>\n<li>You can (correctly) pronounce the words:  &#8220;Saguaro&#8221;, &#8220;Tempe&#8221;, &#8220;Gila Bend&#8221;, &#8220;San Xavier&#8221;, &#8220;Canyon de Chelly&#8221;, &#8220;Mogollon Rim&#8221;, &#8220;Cholla&#8221;, and &#8220;Ajo&#8221;.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>You buy salsa by the gallon. Your Christmas decorations includes a half a yard of sand and l00 paper bags. You think a red light is merely a suggestion. All of your out-of-state friends start to visit after October but clear out come the end of April. You think someone driving wearing oven mitts is [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"wpmdr_menu":1,"wpmdr_menu_extended":{"individualPostRemove":1,"individualPostRemoveDate":1,"individualPostRemoveAuthor":1,"individualPostYoastRemovePublished":1,"individualPostYoastRemoveModified":1},"footnotes":""},"categories":[51],"tags":[153,1159],"class_list":["post-3579","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-regional","tag-arizona","tag-phoenix"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3579","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3579"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3579\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3579"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3579"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3579"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}