{"id":3565,"date":"2015-01-25T19:11:35","date_gmt":"2015-01-25T17:11:35","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/?p=3565"},"modified":"2015-01-25T19:11:35","modified_gmt":"2015-01-25T17:11:35","slug":"you-might-be-from-michigan","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=3565","title":{"rendered":"You Might be From Michigan&#8230;"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li>If you define summer as three months of bad sledding.<\/li>\n<li>If you think Alkaline batteries were named for a Tiger outfielder.<\/li>\n<li>If you can identify an Ohio accent.<\/li>\n<li>If your idea of a seven-course meal is a six pack of Strohs and a bucket of smelt.<\/li>\n<li>If owning a Japanese car was a hanging offense in your hometown.<\/li>\n<li>If you know someone from Porch Yeurn.<\/li>\n<li>If you know what a &#8220;Yooper&#8221; is.<\/li>\n<li>If your car rusts out before you need the brakes done<\/li>\n<li>If you know what a panczki is.<\/li>\n<li>If half the people you know say they are from Detroit, yet you don&#8217;t personally know anyone who actually lives in Detroit.<\/li>\n<li>If the Big Mac is something you drive across.<\/li>\n<li>If you believe &#8220;Down South&#8221; refers to Toledo.<\/li>\n<li>If &#8220;Up North&#8221; means north of Clare.<\/li>\n<li>If you drive 75 on the highway and always pass on the right.<\/li>\n<li>If your little league baseball game has ever been snowed out.<\/li>\n<li>If you know what a pastie is.<\/li>\n<li>If you knew how to drive a boat before you learned to ride a bicycle.<\/li>\n<li>If you know Mackinac rhymes with Mackinaw.<\/li>\n<li>If you occasionally cheer &#8220;Go Lions-and take the Tigers with you.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>If the word &#8220;Thumb&#8221; brings to mind a geographical rather than an anatomical definition.<\/li>\n<li>If you&#8217;ve ever experienced frostbite and sunburn in the same week.<\/li>\n<li>If you expect Vernor&#8217;s when you order Ginger Ale.<\/li>\n<li>If you know that Kalamazoo not only actually exists, but isn&#8217;t too far from Hell.<\/li>\n<li>If your favorite holidays are Christmas, Thanksgiving, and the first day of deer season.<\/li>\n<li>If your snowmobile and fishing boat have big block Chevy engines.<\/li>\n<li>If either your Mother or Father disowns you for the week of the Michigan-Michigan State game.<\/li>\n<li>If your year has two seasons-winter and construction.<\/li>\n<li>If you know what a millage is.<\/li>\n<li>If traveling coast-to-coast means going from Port Huron to Muskegon.<\/li>\n<li>If half of the change in your pocket is Canadian.<\/li>\n<li>If you point to the palm of your right hand when explaining to people where you grew up.<\/li>\n<li>If you call Lake Michigan the West Coast.<\/li>\n<li>If your definition of a small town is one that doesn&#8217;t have a lake<\/li>\n<li>If your family breaks into violence during the UM-MSU game (any sport!)<\/li>\n<li>If snow tires come standard on all your cars.<\/li>\n<li>If at least 50% of your relatives work for the auto industry.<\/li>\n<li>If you learned to pilot a boat before the training wheels were off your bike.<\/li>\n<li>If you don&#8217;t understand what the big deal about Chicago is.<\/li>\n<li>If someone asks you if you&#8217;ve been to Europe and you answer, &#8220;No, but I&#8217;ve been to Ann Arbor&#8221;.<\/li>\n<li>If you have any idea who Bob Ufer was.<\/li>\n<li>If octopus and hockey go together as naturally as hot dogs and baseball.<\/li>\n<li>If traveling coast to coast means going from Port Huron to Muskegon.<\/li>\n<li>If you think &#8220;going up north&#8221; would be a great vacation&#8230;.in January.<\/li>\n<li>If you refer to your relatives in southern Michigan as &#8220;trolls&#8221; or &#8220;lopers&#8221;.<\/li>\n<li>If the &#8220;Big Three&#8221; can mean either Ford, Chrysler and GM or Domino&#8217;s, Little Ceasers&#8217;s and Hungry Howie&#8217;s.<\/li>\n<li>If you have no problem spelling Mackinac Island.<\/li>\n<li>If you had to get a passport to go to Ohio. <\/li>\n<li>If you have as many Canadian coins in your pockets as American ones.<\/li>\n<li>If your kid&#8217;s baseball and softball games have ever been snowed out.<\/li>\n<li>If the trees in your backyard have spigots.<\/li>\n<li>If you know that a place called &#8220;Kalamazoo&#8221; really exists.<\/li>\n<li>If you bake with &#8220;soda&#8221; and drink &#8220;pop&#8221;.<\/li>\n<li>If you drive 70 mph on the highway and pass on the right.<\/li>\n<li>If your favorite hockey team&#8217;s mascot is an octopus.<\/li>\n<li>If you have a favorite hockey team.<\/li>\n<li>If you don&#8217;t have a coughing fit from one sip of Vernor&#8217;s.<\/li>\n<li>If you know how to play Euchre.<\/li>\n<li>If you know how to pronounce Euchre.<\/li>\n<li>If you see nothing wrong with watching fireworks in Detroit on July 2nd.<\/li>\n<li>If you find yourself incapable of throwing cans and bottles away when you are in another state.<\/li>\n<li>If you use the term &#8220;party store&#8221; to describe a store where you buy snacks, beer and liquor.<\/li>\n<li>If you know how to pronounce Sault Ste. Marie.<\/li>\n<li>If you get excited about turning 19.<\/li>\n<li>If you or your child has ever watched Sesame Street in French.<\/li>\n<li>If you&#8217;ve used the term &#8220;Yooper.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>If you&#8217;ve heard the band &#8220;Da Yoopers.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>If you know the words to any song by Da Yoopers.<\/li>\n<li>If you&#8217;ve ever told someone that your move to Alpena was a move to &#8220;a big city&#8221;.<\/li>\n<li>If you&#8217;ve totaled more than three cars bagging a deer.<\/li>\n<li>If you met your spouse in a bowling alley.<\/li>\n<li>If you can&#8217;t understand why the government feels threatened by the Freemen.<\/li>\n<li>If Paradise and Climax are not states but towns to you.<\/li>\n<li>If you know that Kazoo is not a toy, but a town (who actually calls it Kalamazoo anyway?).<\/li>\n<li>If you refer to Ann Arbor as A2.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>If you define summer as three months of bad sledding. If you think Alkaline batteries were named for a Tiger outfielder. If you can identify an Ohio accent. If your idea of a seven-course meal is a six pack of Strohs and a bucket of smelt. If owning a Japanese car was a hanging offense [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"wpmdr_menu":1,"wpmdr_menu_extended":{"individualPostRemove":1,"individualPostRemoveDate":1,"individualPostRemoveAuthor":1,"individualPostYoastRemovePublished":1,"individualPostYoastRemoveModified":1},"footnotes":""},"categories":[51],"tags":[1004],"class_list":["post-3565","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-regional","tag-michigan"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3565","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3565"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3565\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3565"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3565"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3565"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}