(To the tune of Gloria Gaynor’s “I Will Survive”)<\/p>\n
At first I was afraid, I was petrified.
\nBy the ugly wanker that was lying by my side.
\nI would’ve drunk a little less, I would’ve tried to keep my head,
\nIf I’d known for just one second I’d be in your crusty bed…<\/p>\n
I tried to go, walk out the door.
\nBut I laughed so hard at your small knob that I’ve fallen on the floor.
\nYour butts a pimply mess, it’s just a broken-out disgrace,
\nBut I’d rather look at that, than at your fucken ugly face..!<\/p>\n
I want to go, I’ve got to leave.
\nYour talk of chicks and football really makes me want to heave.
\nI only know I’ve got to stop my drinking spirits and the beer
\nCoz when I looked at you last night, you looked just like that Richard Gere!<\/p>\n
I can’t believe, that we both shagged.
\nYou should be wearing concrete shoes or simply bound and gagged.
\nI’m fucking off right now, I’m jumping on the flippin’ train and I’m not
\nstopping till I’m home and washed your greeblies down the drain.<\/p>\n
Please let me go, I feel quite sick,
\nWe had the worst sex in the world and you’re an ugly prick
\nI should have shagged your gorgeous mate, at least he’s got a lovely flat
\nBut no I go and trust the booze and now I’m stuck with you, you twat.<\/p>\n
It’s time to go, run out the door.
\nYou look so ugly it should really be against the law.
\nI’m going to give up all the booze, I’m going to have no stupid fun
\nCoz waking up beside your mug, just makes me want to be a nun!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
(To the tune of Gloria Gaynor’s “I Will Survive”) At first I was afraid, I was petrified. By the ugly wanker that was lying by my side. I would’ve drunk a little less, I would’ve tried to keep my head, If I’d known for just one second I’d be in your crusty bed… I tried […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[43],"tags":[479],"class_list":["post-3396","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-musics","tag-dating"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3396","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3396"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3396\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3396"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3396"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3396"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}