{"id":3246,"date":"2015-01-21T00:12:22","date_gmt":"2015-01-20T22:12:22","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/?p=3246"},"modified":"2015-01-21T00:12:22","modified_gmt":"2015-01-20T22:12:22","slug":"abbreviated-insults","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=3246","title":{"rendered":"Abbreviated Insults"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Great to use in chat rooms or on cell phones!<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>GOPlAinTraFk<br \/>\nGo play in traffic<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>UvGotAFAcLikASqEzdTBag<br \/>\nYou&#8217;ve got a face like a squeezed tea-bag<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>IfUHdABrAnUdBDAjrus<br \/>\nIf you had a brain you&#8217;d be dangerous<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>IfUWnt2AMndREdrTherWldBNoChrge<br \/>\nIf you went to a mind reader there would be no charge<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>INoWenURLIinYaLpsMov<br \/>\nI know when you are lying, Your lips move<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>TLItsROnBtNo1isHOm<br \/>\nThe lights are on, but no one is home<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>URAsMchUsAsMdGrdsOnATortus<br \/>\nYou are as much use as mud guards on a tortoise<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>TWhElsMvnBtTHmstrsDEd<br \/>\nThe Wheel&#8217;s moving but the hamster&#8217;s dead<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>URAsUsfLAsAChocl8Tpot<br \/>\nYou are as much use as a chocolate teapot<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>UR1SndwchShrtOfAPiKnk<br \/>\nYou are one sandwich short of a picnic<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>:-(YaBrAnIsntAsBgAsYa(_,_)<br \/>\nA pity your brain isn&#8217;t as big as your bottom<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Great to use in chat rooms or on cell phones! GOPlAinTraFk Go play in traffic UvGotAFAcLikASqEzdTBag You&#8217;ve got a face like a squeezed tea-bag IfUHdABrAnUdBDAjrus If you had a brain you&#8217;d be dangerous IfUWnt2AMndREdrTherWldBNoChrge If you went to a mind reader there would be no charge INoWenURLIinYaLpsMov I know when you are lying, Your lips [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[69],"tags":[95],"class_list":["post-3246","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-word-play","tag-abbreviations"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3246","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3246"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3246\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3246"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3246"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3246"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}