{"id":3131,"date":"2015-01-18T14:28:52","date_gmt":"2015-01-18T12:28:52","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/?p=3131"},"modified":"2015-01-18T14:28:52","modified_gmt":"2015-01-18T12:28:52","slug":"janet-renos-pet-peeves","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=3131","title":{"rendered":"Janet Reno&#8217;s Pet Peeves"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li>Having to brush up on Spanish just to read hate mail.<\/li>\n<li>Armed troops + civilian resistance = Paperwork, paperwork, paperwork.<\/li>\n<li>In the Elian TV movie, she&#8217;ll likely be played by John Lithgow.<\/li>\n<li>When she gets angry, she turns green and muscles burst through clothes just dry-cleaned.<\/li>\n<li>No one believes, &#8220;It was a chocolate gun pointed at Elian&#8217;s head.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>Whenever she calls &#8220;Playboy&#8221; and offers to pose, Hefner&#8217;s &#8220;in a meeting.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>Saying, &#8220;It&#8217;s the tear gas&#8221; when crying at &#8220;Erin Brockovich.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>When Lenscrafters runs out of gigantic, outdated, poorly-fitted frames.<\/li>\n<li>Men who feel inadequate when she brings battering ram into bedroom.<\/li>\n<li>Constant political pressure to reunite Hall and Oates.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Having to brush up on Spanish just to read hate mail. Armed troops + civilian resistance = Paperwork, paperwork, paperwork. In the Elian TV movie, she&#8217;ll likely be played by John Lithgow. When she gets angry, she turns green and muscles burst through clothes just dry-cleaned. No one believes, &#8220;It was a chocolate gun pointed [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[47],"tags":[863],"class_list":["post-3131","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-politics","tag-janet-reno"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3131","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3131"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3131\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3131"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3131"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3131"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}