{"id":2887,"date":"2015-01-15T14:30:34","date_gmt":"2015-01-15T12:30:34","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/?p=2887"},"modified":"2015-01-15T14:30:34","modified_gmt":"2015-01-15T12:30:34","slug":"letters-to-dear-abby","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=2887","title":{"rendered":"Letters to Dear Abby"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<p><li>Dear Abby: I joined the Navy to see the world. I&#8217;ve seen it. Now, how do I get out?<br \/>\nAbby: Simple. Go to your superior officer and say these 2 words: I&#8217;m Gay.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Dear Abby: I&#8217;ve been going steady with this man for six years. We see each other every night. He says he loves me, and I know I love him, but he never mentions marriage. Do you think he&#8217;s going out with me just for what he can get?<br \/>\nAbby: I don&#8217;t know. What&#8217;s he getting?<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Dear Abby: My boyfriend is going to be twenty years old next month. I&#8217;d like to give him something nice for his birthday. What do you think he&#8217;d like?<br \/>\nAbby: Never mind what he&#8217;d like. Give him a tie.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Dear Abby: Are birth control pills deductible?<br \/>\nAbby: Only if they don&#8217;t work.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Dear Abby: Our son was married in January. Five months later his wife had a ten-pound baby girl. They said the baby was premature. Tell me, can a baby this big be that early?<br \/>\nAbby: The baby was on time, the wedding was late. Forget it!<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Dear Abby: Do you think about dying much?<br \/>\nAbby: No, it&#8217;s the last thing I want to do.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Dear Abby: Is it possible for a man to be in love with two women at the same time?<br \/>\nAbby: Yes, and also hazardous.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Dear Abby: I have always wanted to have my family history traced, but I can&#8217;t afford to spend a lot of money to do it. Any suggestions?<br \/>\nAbby: Yes, Run for public office.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Dear Abby: When you are being introduced, is it all right to say, &#8220;I&#8217;ve heard a lot about you?&#8221;<br \/>\nAbby: It depends on what you&#8217;ve heard.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Dear Abby: What&#8217;s the difference between a wife and a mistress?<br \/>\nAbby: Night and Day.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Dear Abby: I joined the Navy to see the world. I&#8217;ve seen it. Now, how do I get out? Abby: Simple. Go to your superior officer and say these 2 words: I&#8217;m Gay. Dear Abby: I&#8217;ve been going steady with this man for six years. We see each other every night. He says he loves [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[53],"tags":[109],"class_list":["post-2887","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-say-what","tag-advice"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2887","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2887"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2887\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2887"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2887"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2887"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}