{"id":2850,"date":"2015-01-14T19:12:01","date_gmt":"2015-01-14T17:12:01","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/?p=2850"},"modified":"2015-01-14T19:12:01","modified_gmt":"2015-01-14T17:12:01","slug":"how-do-you","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=2850","title":{"rendered":"How do you&#8230;"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<p><li>How do you catch a unique rabbit?<br \/>\nUnique up on it.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>How do you catch a tame rabbit?<br \/>\nTame way, unique up on it.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>How do crazy people go through the forest?<br \/>\nThey take the psycho path. <\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>How do you get holy water?<br \/>\nyou boil the hell out of it.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>What do fish say when they hit a concrete wall?<br \/>\nDam!<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long?<br \/>\nPolaroids. <\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>What do you call a boomerang that doesn&#8217;t work?<br \/>\nA stick.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>What do you call cheese that isn&#8217;t yours?<br \/>\nNacho cheese. <\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>What do you call Santa&#8217;s helpers?<br \/>\nSubordinate clauses. <\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>What do you call four bullfighters in quicksand?<br \/>\nQuattro sinko. <\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>What do you get from a pampered cow?<br \/>\nSpoiled milk.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?<br \/>\nFrostbite.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?<br \/>\nA nervous wreck.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>What&#8217;s the difference between roast beef and pea soup?<br \/>\nAnyone can roast beef.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Where do you find a dog with no legs?<br \/>\nRight where you left him.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Why do gorillas have big nostrils?<br \/>\nBecause they have big fingers. <\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Why don&#8217;t blind people like to sky dive?<br \/>\nBecause it scares the dog.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>What kind of coffee was served on the Titanic?<br \/>\nSanka.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>What is the difference between a Harley and a Hoover?<br \/>\nThe location of the dirt bag.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Why did Pilgrims&#8217; pants always fall down?<br \/>\nBecause they wore their belt buckle on their hat.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>What&#8217;s the difference between a bad golfer and a bad skydiver?<br \/>\nA bad golfer goes Whack, Dang!<br \/>\nA bad skydiver goes Dang! Whack.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>How is a Texas tornado and an Alabama divorce the same?<br \/>\nSomebody&#8217;s gonna lose a trailer! <\/li>\n<\/p>\n<\/ol>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>How do you catch a unique rabbit? Unique up on it. How do you catch a tame rabbit? Tame way, unique up on it. How do crazy people go through the forest? They take the psycho path. How do you get holy water? you boil the hell out of it. What do fish say when [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[69],"tags":[1213],"class_list":["post-2850","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-word-play","tag-puns"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2850","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2850"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2850\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2850"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2850"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2850"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}