{"id":2844,"date":"2015-01-14T19:08:24","date_gmt":"2015-01-14T17:08:24","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/?p=2844"},"modified":"2015-01-14T19:08:24","modified_gmt":"2015-01-14T17:08:24","slug":"heaven-and-hell","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=2844","title":{"rendered":"Heaven and Hell"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><P>Hell is a place where &#8230;<\/p>\n<p>all the police are German;<br \/>\nthe British are the chefs;<br \/>\nthe Norwegians are the singers;<br \/>\nthe French are in charge of organization;<br \/>\nthe Australians are the lovers;<br \/>\nthe Swiss run the navy;<br \/>\nthe Americans are the brewers;<br \/>\nthe Belgians put up the signposts;<br \/>\nall the comedians are Swedish;<br \/>\nthe South Africans are in charge of racial integration;<br \/>\nthe only logic is Irish;<br \/>\nthe speech therapists are Scottish;<br \/>\nthe Ethiopians are in charge of agricultural policy;<br \/>\nthe Italians run the armed forces;<br \/>\nthe Indians are in charge of birth control;<br \/>\nthe tour companies are run by Icelanders;<br \/>\nall the economists are Brazilian;<br \/>\nthe Serbs are in charge of human rights;<br \/>\nthe Spanish are the road builders;<br \/>\nall the orphanages are run by Romanians;<br \/>\n&#8230;and the common language is Finnish;<\/p>\n<p>Heaven is a place where &#8230;<\/p>\n<p>the Germans are in charge of the organization;<br \/>\nall the police are British;<br \/>\nall the environmentalists are Norwegian;<br \/>\nthe French are the chefs;<br \/>\nthe Swiss are the bankers;<br \/>\nall the salesmen are American;<br \/>\nthe Finns make the chocolate;<br \/>\nthe Swedes are the lovers;<br \/>\nthe goldmines are run by South Africans;<br \/>\nall the storytellers are Irish;<br \/>\nall the distillers are Scottish;<br \/>\nthe opera singers are Italian;<br \/>\nthe Danes are the brewers;<br \/>\nall the spices are provided by Indians;<br \/>\nthe fishermen are Icelandic;<br \/>\nall the footballers are Brazilian;<br \/>\nthe Spanish run the holiday resorts;<br \/>\nand the Dutch are the merchants.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Hell is a place where &#8230; all the police are German; the British are the chefs; the Norwegians are the singers; the French are in charge of organization; the Australians are the lovers; the Swiss run the navy; the Americans are the brewers; the Belgians put up the signposts; all the comedians are Swedish; the [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[51],"tags":[1149],"class_list":["post-2844","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-regional","tag-perfect-world"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2844","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2844"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2844\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2844"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2844"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2844"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}