{"id":2517,"date":"2015-01-10T13:30:13","date_gmt":"2015-01-10T11:30:13","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/?p=2517"},"modified":"2015-01-10T13:30:13","modified_gmt":"2015-01-10T11:30:13","slug":"you-know-its-a-no-frills-airline-when","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=2517","title":{"rendered":"You Know It&#8217;s A &#8216;No Frills&#8217; Airline When &#8230;"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li>they don&#8217;t sell tickets, they sell chances.<\/li>\n<li>all the insurance machines in the terminal are sold out.<\/li>\n<li>before the flight, the passengers get together and elect a pilot.<\/li>\n<li>if you kiss the wing for luck before boarding, it kisses you back.<\/li>\n<li>you cannot board the plane unless you have the exact change.<\/li>\n<li>before you took off, the stewardess tells you to fasten your Velcro.<\/li>\n<li>the Captain asks all the passengers to chip in a little for gas.<\/li>\n<li>when they pull the steps away, the plane starts rocking.<\/li>\n<li>the Captain yells at the ground crew to get the cows off the runway.<\/li>\n<li>you ask the Captain how often their planes crash and he sez, &#8220;Just once.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>there&#8217;s no movie.  Don&#8217;t need one.  Your life keeps flashing before your eyes.<\/li>\n<li>you see a man with a gun, but he&#8217;s demanding to be let off the plane.<\/li>\n<li>all the planes have both a bathroom and a chapel.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>they don&#8217;t sell tickets, they sell chances. all the insurance machines in the terminal are sold out. before the flight, the passengers get together and elect a pilot. if you kiss the wing for luck before boarding, it kisses you back. you cannot board the plane unless you have the exact change. before you took [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[63],"tags":[120,1075],"class_list":["post-2517","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-travel","tag-airline","tag-no-frills"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2517","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2517"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2517\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2517"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2517"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2517"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}