{"id":2416,"date":"2015-01-08T11:52:10","date_gmt":"2015-01-08T09:52:10","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/?p=2416"},"modified":"2015-01-08T11:52:10","modified_gmt":"2015-01-08T09:52:10","slug":"my-wife-is-expecting","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=2416","title":{"rendered":"My Wife is Expecting"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>A young private sought permission from his Commanding Officer to leave camp the following weekend. &#8220;You see,&#8221; he explained, &#8220;my wife&#8217;s expecting.&#8221; &#8220;Oh,&#8221; said the Officer, &#8220;I understand. Go ahead and tell your wife that I wish her luck.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>The following week the same soldier was back again with the same explanation, &#8220;My wife&#8217;s expecting.&#8221; The Officer looked surprised. &#8220;Still expecting?&#8221; he said, &#8220;Well, well, my boy, you must be pretty bothered. Of course you can have the weekend off.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>When the same soldier appeared again the third week, however, the Officer lost his temper. &#8220;Don&#8217;t tell me your wife is still expecting!&#8221; he bellowed.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Yes, sir!&#8221; said the soldier resolutely, &#8220;She&#8217;s still expecting.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;What in heaven is she expecting?&#8221; cried the Officer.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Me,&#8221; said the soldier simply.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>A young private sought permission from his Commanding Officer to leave camp the following weekend. &#8220;You see,&#8221; he explained, &#8220;my wife&#8217;s expecting.&#8221; &#8220;Oh,&#8221; said the Officer, &#8220;I understand. Go ahead and tell your wife that I wish her luck.&#8221; The following week the same soldier was back again with the same explanation, &#8220;My wife&#8217;s expecting.&#8221; [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"wpmdr_menu":1,"wpmdr_menu_extended":{"individualPostRemove":1,"individualPostRemoveDate":1,"individualPostRemoveAuthor":1,"individualPostYoastRemovePublished":1,"individualPostYoastRemoveModified":1},"footnotes":""},"categories":[38],"tags":[1237],"class_list":["post-2416","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-mil","tag-recruit"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2416","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2416"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2416\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2416"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2416"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2416"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}