{"id":2382,"date":"2015-01-07T22:50:56","date_gmt":"2015-01-07T20:50:56","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/?p=2382"},"modified":"2015-01-07T22:50:56","modified_gmt":"2015-01-07T20:50:56","slug":"air-farce","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=2382","title":{"rendered":"Air Farce"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Here are some (supposedly) actual maintenance complaints submitted by US Air Force pilots and the replies from the maintenance crews:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Problem:  &#8220;Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.&#8221;<br \/>\nSolution: &#8220;Almost replaced left inside main tire.&#8221;<\/li>\n<p><li>Problem:  &#8220;Test flight OK, except autoland very rough.&#8221;<br \/>\nSolution:  &#8220;Autoland not installed on this aircraft.&#8221;<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Problem:  &#8220;No. 2 Propeller seeping prop fluid.&#8221;<br \/>\nSolution:  &#8220;No. 2 Propeller seepage normal.&#8221;<br \/>\nSolution:  &#8220;No. 1, No. 3, and No. 4 Propellers lack normal seepage.&#8221;<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Problem:  &#8220;Something loose in cockpit.&#8221;<br \/>\nSolution:  &#8220;Something tightened in cockpit.&#8221;<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Problem:  &#8220;Evidence of hydraulic leak on right main landing gear.&#8221;<br \/>\nSolution:  &#8220;Evidence removed.&#8221;<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Problem:  &#8220;Dead bugs on windshield.&#8221;<br \/>\nSolution:  &#8220;Live bugs on order.&#8221;<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Problem:  &#8220;Autopilot in altitude hold mode produces a 200 fpm descent.&#8221;<br \/>\nSolution:  &#8220;Cannot reproduce problem on ground.&#8221;<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Problem:  &#8220;IFF inoperative.&#8221;<br \/>\nSolution:  &#8220;IFF inoperative in OFF mode.&#8221;<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Problem:  &#8220;Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.&#8221;<br \/>\nSolution:  &#8220;That&#8217;s what they&#8217;re there for.&#8221;<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Problem:  &#8220;Number three engine missing.&#8221;<br \/>\nSolution:  &#8220;Engine found on right wing after brief search.&#8221;<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Here are some (supposedly) actual maintenance complaints submitted by US Air Force pilots and the replies from the maintenance crews: Problem: &#8220;Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.&#8221; Solution: &#8220;Almost replaced left inside main tire.&#8221; Problem: &#8220;Test flight OK, except autoland very rough.&#8221; Solution: &#8220;Autoland not installed on this aircraft.&#8221; Problem: &#8220;No. 2 Propeller seeping [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"wpmdr_menu":1,"wpmdr_menu_extended":{"individualPostRemove":1,"individualPostRemoveDate":1,"individualPostRemoveAuthor":1,"individualPostYoastRemovePublished":1,"individualPostYoastRemoveModified":1},"footnotes":""},"categories":[38],"tags":[117,948,1167],"class_list":["post-2382","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-mil","tag-air-force","tag-maintenance","tag-pilots"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2382","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2382"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2382\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2382"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2382"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2382"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}