For those that apply, please fill out the form below, and return it immediately to your local state representative, congressman, grocer, or recently fired postal worker …. <\/p>\n
Dear:_________________<\/p>\n
[ ] Clueless Newbie
\n[ ] Lamer
\n[ ] AOLer
\n[ ] Me-too-er
\n[ ] Pervert
\n[ ] Geek
\n[ ] Spammer
\n[ ] Nerd ] Elvis
\n[ ] Fed
\n[ ] Freak
\n[ ] Scientologist
\n[ ] Socialist
\n[ ] Bible-thumper
\n[ ] anonymous coward<\/p>\n
You Are Being Flamed Because:
\n[ ] You posted a “test” in a newsgroup other than alt.test
\n[ ] You posted warez in pieces LESS than 5000 lines
\n[ ] You posted something asking for warez sites
\n[ ] You quoted an ENTIRE post in your reply
\n[ ] You continued a long, stupid thread
\n[ ] You started an off-topic thread
\n[ ] You posted a “YOU ALL SUCK” message
\n[ ] You said “me too” to something
\n[ ] You suck
\n[ ] You brag about things that never happened
\n[ ] Your sig\/alias\/server sucks
\n[ ] You made up slang then used it in a message
\n[ ] I don’t like your tone of voice
\n[ ] I think you might be a fed
\n[ ] You posted to more than four newsgroups
\n[ ] You were imposing your religious beliefs on others
\n[ ] You posted something really stupid\/depraved
\n[ ] You tried to blame others for your stupidity
\n[ ] you incorrectly assumed unwarranted moral or intellectual superiority
\n[ ] you are posting an anonymous attack<\/p>\n
To Repent, You Must:
\n[ ] Be the PR person for George Michaels
\n[ ] Give up your AOL account
\n[ ] Bust up your modem with a hammer and eat it
\n[ ] Jump into a bathtub while holding your monitor
\n[ ] Actually post something relevant
\n[ ] Read the FAQ
\n[ ] Be Senator Exon’s love slave
\n[ ] Be the guest of honor in alt.flame for a month
\n[ ] Post your tests to alt.test
\n[ ] Print your home phone number in your adverts
\n[ ] Slam your fingers in a desk drawer repeatedly
\n[ ] Become a Satanist, sell your kids to Michael Jackson<\/p>\n
In Closing, I’d Like to Say:
\n[ ] Bite me
\n[ ] Get a life
\n[ ] Never post again
\n[ ] I pity your dog
\n[ ] Yer momma’s so fat\/stupid\/ugly that etc…
\n[ ] Take your crap somewhere else
\n[ ] Learn to post or sod off
\n[ ] Do us all a favor and crawl into some industrial machinery
\n[ ] See how far your tongue will fit into the electric outlet
\n[ ] All of the above <\/p>\n
p.s. Lighten up people – it’s just a joke \ud83d\ude42 Before you dive for the Reply
\nkey to bang out a nasty flame, keep in mind…. “sticks & stones”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
For those that apply, please fill out the form below, and return it immediately to your local state representative, congressman, grocer, or recently fired postal worker …. Dear:_________________ [ ] Clueless Newbie [ ] Lamer [ ] AOLer [ ] Me-too-er [ ] Pervert [ ] Geek [ ] Spammer [ ] Nerd ] Elvis […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[654,667],"class_list":["post-238","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-apps-and-forms","tag-flame","tag-forms"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/238","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=238"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/238\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=238"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=238"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=238"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}