{"id":234,"date":"2014-12-21T18:29:15","date_gmt":"2014-12-21T16:29:15","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/fun\/?p=234"},"modified":"2014-12-21T18:29:15","modified_gmt":"2014-12-21T16:29:15","slug":"application-to-date-our-daughter","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=234","title":{"rendered":"Application to Date Our Daughter"},"content":{"rendered":"<ol>\n<li>Place your Photo here.<\/li>\n<p><li>Name<br \/>\nDate of birth<br \/>\nAddress<br \/>\nPhone Number<br \/>\nSocial Security Number<br \/>\nBoy Scout rank<br \/>\nMother&#8217;s name<br \/>\nFather&#8217;s name<\/li>\n<li>Do you own or have any of these items:\n<p>___ motorcycle<br \/>\n___ muscle car or sports car<br \/>\n___ earring or piercing anywhere<br \/>\n___ van<br \/>\n___ firearm<br \/>\n___ tattoo<br \/>\n___ truck with oversized tires<br \/>\n___ exotic pet, such as a snake<br \/>\n___ electric guitar<\/p>\n<p>[If you checked any of these items, discontinue application and leave immediately.]<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Do you:<br \/>\nDo you smoke? Yes  No<br \/>\nDo you drink? Yes No<br \/>\nDo you gamble? Yes No<br \/>\nHave you ever been arrested? Yes No<br \/>\nDo you ever drive over the speed limit? Yes No<br \/>\nHave you ever seen Elvis? Yes No<br \/>\nHave you ever seen a UFO? Yes No<br \/>\nHave you ever seen Elvis in a UFO? Yes No<br \/>\nWatched a porn video? Yes No<\/p>\n<p>[If you answered Yes to any of the preceeding questions, discontinue application and leave immediately.]<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<li>Preferred dating activity:<\/li>\n<p>___ Walk in the park<br \/>\n___ Watch a School play<br \/>\n___ Minature Golf<\/li>\n<p>\n<li>In 50 words or less, tell exactly what the words &#8220;Don&#8217;t be late&#8221; mean to you.<\/li>\n<li>You must attach a complete police record and latest diploma or transcript.<\/li>\n<li>Signatures:\n<p>Your Signature: _____________________________<\/p>\n<p>Parents&#8217; signatures:____________________________  _________________________________<\/p>\n<p>Police Chief&#8217;s signature: ______________________________<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<\/ul>\n<p>[Please allow 4 to 6 years for processing. Any unanswered questions will result in forfeiture of application. Apply at your own risk.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Place your Photo here. Name Date of birth Address Phone Number Social Security Number Boy Scout rank Mother&#8217;s name Father&#8217;s name Do you own or have any of these items: ___ motorcycle ___ muscle car or sports car ___ earring or piercing anywhere ___ van ___ firearm ___ tattoo ___ truck with oversized tires ___ [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[149,477,481,1246],"class_list":["post-234","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-apps-and-forms","tag-application","tag-date","tag-daughter","tag-relationship"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/234","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=234"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/234\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=234"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=234"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=234"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}