{"id":2237,"date":"2015-01-06T12:24:21","date_gmt":"2015-01-06T10:24:21","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/?p=2237"},"modified":"2015-01-06T12:24:21","modified_gmt":"2015-01-06T10:24:21","slug":"things-you-dont-want-to-hear-during-surgery","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=2237","title":{"rendered":"Things You Don&#8217;t Want to Hear During Surgery"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li>FIRE! FIRE! Everyone get out now!!<\/li>\n<li>And now we remove the subject&#8217;s brain and place it in the body of the ape.<\/li>\n<li>Don&#8217;t worry. I think it is sharp enough.<\/li>\n<li>Uh-oh.<\/li>\n<li>I don&#8217;t know where that came from! Just put it over there.<\/li>\n<li>Better crank up that anesthesia.<\/li>\n<li>I don&#8217;t think that was supposed to come off.<\/li>\n<li>Gonna have to stop here, his insurance won&#8217;t pay for the rest.<\/li>\n<li>Well, it&#8217;s five o&#8217;clock! We&#8217;ll just put this off till tomorrow.<\/li>\n<li>Hey&#8230;.maybe the janitor knows what this is.<\/li>\n<li>Cool! These colors are giving me flashbacks.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>FIRE! FIRE! Everyone get out now!! And now we remove the subject&#8217;s brain and place it in the body of the ape. Don&#8217;t worry. I think it is sharp enough. Uh-oh. I don&#8217;t know where that came from! Just put it over there. Better crank up that anesthesia. I don&#8217;t think that was supposed to [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[35],"tags":[809,1385,1463],"class_list":["post-2237","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-medical","tag-hospital","tag-surgery","tag-trouble"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2237","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2237"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2237\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2237"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2237"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2237"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}