When you are sad, I will get you drunk and help you plot
\nrevenge against the scum sucking bastard\/bitch who made you sad.<\/p>\n
When you are scared, I will laugh at you and tease
\nyou about it every chance I get.<\/p>\n
When you are worried, I will tell you how much worse
\nit could be and to quit complaining.<\/p>\n
When you are confused, I will use little words
\nto explain it to your dumb ass.<\/p>\n
When you are sick, I will hold your hair while you
\n pay homage to the porcelain god.<\/p>\n
When you fall, I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass.<\/p>\n
This is my oath; I pledge till the end.<\/p>\n
Why you may ask? Because you’re my friend.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
When you are sad, I will get you drunk and help you plot revenge against the scum sucking bastard\/bitch who made you sad. When you are scared, I will laugh at you and tease you about it every chance I get. When you are worried, I will tell you how much worse it could be […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[31],"tags":[678],"class_list":["post-2104","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-inspire","tag-friendship"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2104","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2104"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2104\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2104"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2104"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2104"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}