{"id":1946,"date":"2015-01-04T17:58:57","date_gmt":"2015-01-04T15:58:57","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/?p=1946"},"modified":"2015-01-04T17:58:57","modified_gmt":"2015-01-04T15:58:57","slug":"political-correctness-for-kids","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=1946","title":{"rendered":"Political Correctness For Kids"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li>Your bedroom isn&#8217;t cluttered; it&#8217;s &#8220;passage-restrictive&#8221;.<\/li>\n<li>Kids don&#8217;t get in trouble anymore. They merely hit &#8220;social speed bumps&#8221;.<\/li>\n<li>You&#8217;re not having a bad hair day; you&#8217;re suffering from &#8220;rebellious follicle syndrome&#8221;.<\/li>\n<li>No one&#8217;s tall anymore. They&#8217;re &#8220;vertically enhanced&#8221;.<\/li>\n<li>You&#8217;re not shy. You&#8217;re &#8220;conversationally selective&#8221;.<\/li>\n<li>You don&#8217;t talk a lot. You&#8217;re just &#8220;abundantly verbal&#8221;.<\/li>\n<li>It&#8217;s not called gossip anymore. It&#8217;s &#8220;transmission of near-factual information&#8221;.<\/li>\n<li>The food at the school cafeteria isn&#8217;t awful. It&#8217;s &#8220;digestively challenged&#8221;.<\/li>\n<li>Your homework isn&#8217;t missing; it&#8217;s just having an &#8220;out-of-notebook experience&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>You&#8217;re not sleeping in class; you&#8217;re &#8220;rationing consciousness&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>You don&#8217;t have smelly gym socks; you have &#8220;odor-retentive athletic footwear&#8221;.<\/li>\n<li>You weren&#8217;t passing notes in class. You were &#8220;participating in the discreet exchange of penned meditations&#8221;.<\/li>\n<li>You&#8217;re not being sent to the principal&#8217;s office. You&#8217;re &#8220;going on a mandatory field trip to the administrative building&#8221;.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Your bedroom isn&#8217;t cluttered; it&#8217;s &#8220;passage-restrictive&#8221;. Kids don&#8217;t get in trouble anymore. They merely hit &#8220;social speed bumps&#8221;. You&#8217;re not having a bad hair day; you&#8217;re suffering from &#8220;rebellious follicle syndrome&#8221;. No one&#8217;s tall anymore. They&#8217;re &#8220;vertically enhanced&#8221;. You&#8217;re not shy. You&#8217;re &#8220;conversationally selective&#8221;. You don&#8217;t talk a lot. You&#8217;re just &#8220;abundantly verbal&#8221;. It&#8217;s not [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[22],"tags":[359,1178],"class_list":["post-1946","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-families","tag-children","tag-politically-correct"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1946","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1946"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1946\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1946"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1946"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1946"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}