{"id":1926,"date":"2015-01-04T17:43:59","date_gmt":"2015-01-04T15:43:59","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/?p=1926"},"modified":"2015-01-04T17:43:59","modified_gmt":"2015-01-04T15:43:59","slug":"great-truths-from-small-children","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=1926","title":{"rendered":"Great Truths from Small Children"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li>When your mom is mad at your dad, don&#8217;t let her brush your hair.<\/li>\n<li>If your sister hits you, don&#8217;t hit her back. They always catch the second person.<\/li>\n<li>Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.<\/li>\n<li>You can&#8217;t trust dogs to watch your food.<\/li>\n<li>Reading what people write on desks can teach you a lot.<\/li>\n<li>Don&#8217;t sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.<\/li>\n<li>Puppies still have bad breath even after eating a tic tac.<\/li>\n<li>Never hold a dustbuster and a cat at the same time.<\/li>\n<li>Don&#8217;t wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.<\/li>\n<li>A pencil without an eraser may as well just be a pen.<\/li>\n<li>Don&#8217;t say that the &#8220;Last One is a Rotten Egg&#8221; unless you&#8217;re absolutely sure there&#8217;s a slow kid behind you.<\/li>\n<li>You can&#8217;t start over just because you&#8217;re losing the game.<\/li>\n<li>All libraries smell the same.<\/li>\n<li>If you want someone to listen to you, whisper it.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>When your mom is mad at your dad, don&#8217;t let her brush your hair. If your sister hits you, don&#8217;t hit her back. They always catch the second person. Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato. You can&#8217;t trust dogs to watch your food. Reading what people write on desks can teach [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[22],"tags":[359,1466],"class_list":["post-1926","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-families","tag-children","tag-truths"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1926","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1926"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1926\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1926"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1926"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1926"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}