{"id":1924,"date":"2015-01-04T17:42:30","date_gmt":"2015-01-04T15:42:30","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/?p=1924"},"modified":"2015-01-04T17:42:30","modified_gmt":"2015-01-04T15:42:30","slug":"from-the-mouths-of-babes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=1924","title":{"rendered":"From The Mouths Of Babes&#8230;"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li>&#8220;Close the curtains,&#8221; requested our 2 year old granddaughter, sitting in a pool of bright light. &#8220;The sun&#8217;s looking at me too hard.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>My friend asked our grandson when he would turn 6.  He replied, &#8220;When I&#8217;m tired of being 5.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>Seeing her first hailstorm, Mary Sue, age 3, exclaimed, &#8220;Mommy, it&#8217;s raining dumplings!&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>As I frantically waved away a pesky fly with a white dishtowel, my granddaughter observed, &#8220;Maybe he thinks you&#8217;re surrendering.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>A friend&#8217;s grandson, 4, was reading with his granddad about Adam and Eve. He asked, &#8220;Is this where God took out the man&#8217;s brain and made a woman?&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>Announcing to daughter Lori that her aunt just had a baby and it looked like her uncle, she said, &#8220;You mean he has a mustache?&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>When I asked our grandson if he could name the capital of Florida, he fired right back, &#8220;Capital F!&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>While shampooing our son, 4, I noted his hair was growing so fast he&#8217;d soon need it cut. He replied, &#8220;Maybe we shouldn&#8217;t water it so much.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>My daughter told her 5-year-old that their van was going to be fixed. Instantly, the small fry assumed, &#8220;Oh, it&#8217;s going to the tire-o-practor?&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>Impressed by her 5-year-old&#8217;s vocabulary, my friend complimented the young scholar, who nonchalantly responded, &#8221; I have words in my head I haven&#8217;t even used yet.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>His Mom informed her son, Brian, that she was going outside to get a little sun. &#8220;But Mommy, he gulped, &#8220;You already have a son. Me!&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>When our son asked about two look-alike classmates at school, we told him they were probably twins. The next day, he came home from school all bubbly and said, &#8220;Guess what! They are not only twins&#8230;.they&#8217;re brothers!!&#8221;<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&#8220;Close the curtains,&#8221; requested our 2 year old granddaughter, sitting in a pool of bright light. &#8220;The sun&#8217;s looking at me too hard.&#8221; My friend asked our grandson when he would turn 6. He replied, &#8220;When I&#8217;m tired of being 5.&#8221; Seeing her first hailstorm, Mary Sue, age 3, exclaimed, &#8220;Mommy, it&#8217;s raining dumplings!&#8221; As [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[22],"tags":[359,1222],"class_list":["post-1924","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-families","tag-children","tag-quips"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1924","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1924"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1924\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1924"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1924"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1924"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}