{"id":1885,"date":"2015-01-04T01:47:10","date_gmt":"2015-01-03T23:47:10","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/?p=1885"},"modified":"2015-01-04T01:47:10","modified_gmt":"2015-01-03T23:47:10","slug":"signs-the-ice-cream-truck-driver-is-crazy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=1885","title":{"rendered":"Signs the Ice Cream Truck Driver is Crazy"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li>Number of kills clearly marked on the side of his truck.<\/li>\n<li>He&#8217;s paranoid because he&#8217;s &#8220;always being followed by someone disguised as little children.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>His route takes him down your street at precisely 3:30 am every morning.<\/li>\n<li>Comes to work wearing only a strategically placed waffle cone.<\/li>\n<li>Happy calliope music replaced with Mozart&#8217;s &#8220;Requiem.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>On Tuesdays, drives backwards and demands ice cream from little kids.<\/li>\n<li>Ice cream sandwiches come with alfalfa sprouts, Dijon mustard and a pickle.<\/li>\n<li>&#8220;Ice cream! Get your&#8230; HEY, YOU GET THE HELL AWAY FROM MY TRUCK! &#8230;..Ice cream, get your ice cream!&#8230;&#8221;<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Number of kills clearly marked on the side of his truck. He&#8217;s paranoid because he&#8217;s &#8220;always being followed by someone disguised as little children.&#8221; His route takes him down your street at precisely 3:30 am every morning. Comes to work wearing only a strategically placed waffle cone. Happy calliope music replaced with Mozart&#8217;s &#8220;Requiem.&#8221; On [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"wpmdr_menu":1,"wpmdr_menu_extended":{"individualPostRemove":1,"individualPostRemoveDate":1,"individualPostRemoveAuthor":1,"individualPostYoastRemovePublished":1,"individualPostYoastRemoveModified":1},"footnotes":""},"categories":[27],"tags":[454,828,924],"class_list":["post-1885","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-funlists","tag-crazy","tag-ice-cream-truck-driver","tag-lists"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1885","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1885"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1885\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1885"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1885"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1885"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}