{"id":1834,"date":"2015-01-03T19:30:17","date_gmt":"2015-01-03T17:30:17","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/?p=1834"},"modified":"2015-01-03T19:30:17","modified_gmt":"2015-01-03T17:30:17","slug":"changes-in-california-under-governor-schwarzenegger","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=1834","title":{"rendered":"Changes in California Under Governor Schwarzenegger"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li>&#8220;Hooked on Accents&#8221; is implemented in school systems statewide.<\/li>\n<li>Women&#8217;s buttocks must be minimally covered with a regular bikini bottom or Governor Arnold&#8217;s hand.<\/li>\n<li>So many liberals flee the state that it actually lifts up out of the sea.<\/li>\n<li>Swearing-in ceremony followed by an invitation-only executive-branch orgy.<\/li>\n<li>Democrats suddenly develop a much deeper appreciation for the right to recall elected officials.<\/li>\n<li>&#8220;Your incomes &#8212; give them to me.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>Gray Davis will be returned to the petrified forest from whence he came.<\/li>\n<li>All female employees in the Statehouse are referred to as &#8220;Pat&#8221; and &#8220;Fanny.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>California Department of Food and Agriculture now classifies steroids as a vegetable.<\/li>\n<li>As part of a &#8220;family first&#8221; agenda, he works to get dear ol&#8217; Dad&#8217;s Nazi party back on the ballot.<\/li>\n<li>The governor&#8217;s televised speeches have subtitles for those who speak Spanish and English.<\/li>\n<li>Two words: flab tax<\/li>\n<li>Statewide, the fourth Thursday in November is officially renamed &#8220;Danksgiffin.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>Not only kisses babies, but gropes their moms, too.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p align=\"center\">[  The Top 5 List   ]<br \/>[   Copyright 2003 by Chris White    ]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&#8220;Hooked on Accents&#8221; is implemented in school systems statewide. Women&#8217;s buttocks must be minimally covered with a regular bikini bottom or Governor Arnold&#8217;s hand. So many liberals flee the state that it actually lifts up out of the sea. Swearing-in ceremony followed by an invitation-only executive-branch orgy. Democrats suddenly develop a much deeper appreciation for [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"wpmdr_menu":1,"wpmdr_menu_extended":{"individualPostRemove":1,"individualPostRemoveDate":1,"individualPostRemoveAuthor":1,"individualPostYoastRemovePublished":1,"individualPostYoastRemoveModified":1},"footnotes":""},"categories":[30],"tags":[157,301,369,1445],"class_list":["post-1834","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-government","tag-arnold-schwartzenegger","tag-california","tag-chris-white","tag-top-5-list"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1834","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1834"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1834\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1834"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1834"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1834"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}