‘Twas a quiet night,
\nAnd all through the house,
\nNo one was home,
\nNot even the spouse.<\/p>\n
I was real horny,
\nWith no one here who would care,
\nSo I dialed AOL,
\nTo see if My friends were there.<\/p>\n
I looked at my buddy list,
\nTo see who was online,
\nWhile visions of cyber-sex,
\nDanced through my mind.<\/p>\n
When all of a sudden,
\nWho on my list should appear,
\nJust the best little cyber-babe,
\nI’d ever had here.<\/p>\n
I IM’d her with “hey darlin”,
\nKisses, hugs, and hello,
\nWhen I suggested a private room,
\nShe said ‘lets go”.<\/p>\n
I made up a name,
\nWe both clicked, and were in,
\nAnticipating the fun that,
\nWas about to begin.<\/p>\n
We {S kissed and {S hugged,
\nThen our clothes we did shuck,
\nIt was just then,
\nI ran out of luck.<\/p>\n
Naked and hot,
\nTo the imaginary bed we scooted,
\nWhen the next thing I knew,
\nI had been booted.<\/p>\n
I ranted and raved,
\nAnd cursed AOL,
\nFor taking my money and,
\nPutting me through hell.<\/p>\n
I signed on again,
\nAnd impatiently waited,
\nHoping and praying,
\nHer lust hadn’t abated.<\/p>\n
I was finally online and,
\nTo the room I did dash,
\nTo my little cyber-girl,
\nAnd heaven at last.<\/p>\n
We got past the foreplay,
\nWere cyber-fuckin and then,
\nTo my utter frustration,
\nI was booted again.<\/p>\n
I cursed AOL,
\nAs I got back online,
\nFor what I swore would be,
\nThe very last time.<\/p>\n
We got down to business,
\nAnd as the end neared,
\nIt happened again,
\nThat thing that I feared.<\/p>\n
Now the first was bad timing,
\nThe second rough,
\nBut the third time booted,
\nI’d had enough.<\/p>\n
A letter I wrote,
\nAddressed to Steve Case,
\nTelling him what I would do,
\nIf we ever came face to face.<\/p>\n
I wrote in great detail,
\nJust how he would pay,
\nFor my getting booted,
\nThree times getting layed.<\/p>\n
You may think this funny,
\nAn ass-slappin hoot,
\nBut the next time you cyber,
\nWATCH OUT FOR THE BOOT<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
‘Twas a quiet night, And all through the house, No one was home, Not even the spouse. I was real horny, With no one here who would care, So I dialed AOL, To see if My friends were there. I looked at my buddy list, To see who was online, While visions of cyber-sex, Danced […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5,64],"tags":[145,406,471,1172],"class_list":["post-182","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-aol","category-twas","tag-aol","tag-computer","tag-cybersex","tag-poetry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/182","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=182"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/182\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=182"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=182"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=182"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}