{"id":1783,"date":"2015-01-02T20:35:59","date_gmt":"2015-01-02T18:35:59","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/?p=1783"},"modified":"2015-01-02T20:35:59","modified_gmt":"2015-01-02T18:35:59","slug":"excuses-for-eating","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=1783","title":{"rendered":"Excuses for Eating"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Everybody has a good excuse for not attending church. If you take those excuses and apply them to other things we do (or don&#8217;t do), like eating, they might look like this  list:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>I was forced to eat as a child.<\/li>\n<li>People who eat all the time are hypocrites; they aren&#8217;t really hungry.<\/li>\n<li>There are so many different kinds of food, I can&#8217;t decide what to eat.<\/li>\n<li>I used to eat, but I got bored and stopped.<\/li>\n<li>I only eat on special occasions, like Christmas and Easter.<\/li>\n<li>None of my friends will eat with me.<\/li>\n<li>I&#8217;ll start eating when I get older.<\/li>\n<li>I don&#8217;t really have time to eat.<\/li>\n<li>I don&#8217;t believe that eating does anybody any good. It&#8217;s just a crutch.<\/li>\n<li>Restaurants and grocery stores are only after your money.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Everybody has a good excuse for not attending church. If you take those excuses and apply them to other things we do (or don&#8217;t do), like eating, they might look like this list: I was forced to eat as a child. People who eat all the time are hypocrites; they aren&#8217;t really hungry. There are [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[17],"tags":[566,610],"class_list":["post-1783","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-diet","tag-eating","tag-excuse"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1783","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1783"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1783\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1783"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1783"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1783"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}