{"id":1753,"date":"2015-01-02T13:58:37","date_gmt":"2015-01-02T11:58:37","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/fun\/?p=1753"},"modified":"2015-01-02T13:58:37","modified_gmt":"2015-01-02T11:58:37","slug":"ways-to-insure-you-get-audited","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=1753","title":{"rendered":"Ways to Insure You Get Audited"},"content":{"rendered":"

From the folks at Hallmark.com and their creation, Maxine the Queen of Crabbiness, here are 10 ways to ensure getting audited by the IRS:<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. Pay in pennies (delivered by sling slot).<\/li>\n
  2. Deduct calls made to the Psychic Network in an attempt to get winning PowerBall numbers.<\/li>\n
  3. Claim your cat as a dependent.<\/li>\n
  4. Claim charitable deductions that equal more than your income.<\/li>\n
  5. On the line that asks what you made this year, answer “Trouble.”<\/li>\n
  6. Deduct adoption costs associated with adopting a new personality.<\/li>\n
  7. Claim a home office deduction based on all the in-home counseling you give to friends and family.<\/li>\n
  8. Wait till the last minute and copy the numbers from the guy standing next to you in line at the post office.<\/li>\n
  9. Fill out your forms in yellow crayon.<\/li>\n
  10. Detail 11,215 Internet stock trades — and claim you came out exactly even.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    From the folks at Hallmark.com and their creation, Maxine the Queen of Crabbiness, here are 10 ways to ensure getting audited by the IRS: Pay in pennies (delivered by sling slot). Deduct calls made to the Psychic Network in an attempt to get winning PowerBall numbers. Claim your cat as a dependent. Claim charitable deductions […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[30],"tags":[165,858,976],"class_list":["post-1753","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-government","tag-audit","tag-irs","tag-maxine"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1753","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1753"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1753\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1753"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1753"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1753"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}