{"id":1584,"date":"2014-12-31T21:35:02","date_gmt":"2014-12-31T19:35:02","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/fun\/?p=1584"},"modified":"2014-12-31T21:35:02","modified_gmt":"2014-12-31T19:35:02","slug":"why-dogs-are-better-pets-than-cats","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=1584","title":{"rendered":"Why Dogs Are Better Pets Than Cats"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li>Dogs will tilt their heads and try to understand every word you say. Cats will ignore you and take a nap.<\/li>\n<li>Cats look silly on a leash.<\/li>\n<li>When you come home from work, your dog will be happy and lick your face. Cats will still be mad at you for leaving in the first place.<\/li>\n<li>Dogs will give you unconditional love until the day they die. Cats will make you pay for every mistake you&#8217;ve ever made since the day you were born.<\/li>\n<li>A dog knows when you&#8217;re sad. And he&#8217;ll try to comfort you. Cats don&#8217;t care how you feel, as long as you remember where the can opener is.<\/li>\n<li>Dogs will bring you your slippers. Cats will drop a dead mouse in your slippers.<\/li>\n<li>When you take them for a ride, dogs will sit on the seat next to you. Cats have to have their own private basket, or they won&#8217;t go at all.<\/li>\n<li>Dogs will come when you call them. And they&#8217;ll be happy. Cats will have someone take a message and get back to you.<\/li>\n<li>Dogs will play fetch with you all day long. The only thing cats will play with all day long are small rodents or bugs, preferably ones that look like they&#8217;re in pain.<\/li>\n<li>Dogs will wake you up if the house is on fire. Cats will quietly sneak out the back door.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Dogs will tilt their heads and try to understand every word you say. Cats will ignore you and take a nap. Cats look silly on a leash. When you come home from work, your dog will be happy and lick your face. Cats will still be mad at you for leaving in the first place. [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[19],"tags":[330,1153],"class_list":["post-1584","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-dogs","tag-cat-vs-dog","tag-pet"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1584","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1584"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1584\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1584"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1584"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1584"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}