{"id":1564,"date":"2014-12-31T21:06:10","date_gmt":"2014-12-31T19:06:10","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/fun\/?p=1564"},"modified":"2014-12-31T21:06:10","modified_gmt":"2014-12-31T19:06:10","slug":"how-many-dogs-does-it-take-to-change-a-light-bulb","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=1564","title":{"rendered":"How Many Dogs Does It Take to Change a Light Bulb?"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li>Golden Retriever:  The sun is shining. The day is young. We&#8217;ve got our whole lives ahead of us. And you&#8217;re inside worrying about a stupid, burned-out light bulb?<\/li>\n<li>Border Collie:  Just one. Not only that, but I&#8217;ll replace any wiring that&#8217;s not up to code.<\/li>\n<li>Dachshund:  I can&#8217;t reach the lamp!<\/li>\n<li>Toy Poodle:  I&#8217;ll just talk sweet to the Border collie and he&#8217;ll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry.<\/li>\n<li>Rottweiler:  Go ahead!  Make me!<\/li>\n<li>Shi-tzu:  Puh-leeze, dah-ling.  What are servants for?<\/li>\n<li>Lab:  Oh, me, me!!!  Pleeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can I? Can I?  Huh?  Huh?  Can I?<\/li>\n<li>Malamute:  Let the Border collie do it.  You can feed me while he&#8217;s busy.<\/li>\n<li>Doberman Pinscher:  While it&#8217;s dark, I&#8217;m going to sleep on the couch.<\/li>\n<li>Hound Dog:  ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ<\/li>\n<li>Chihuahua:  Yo quiero Taco Bulb.<\/li>\n<li>Pointer:  I see it, there it is, right there&#8230;<\/li>\n<li>Greyhound:  It isn&#8217;t moving. Who cares?<\/li>\n<li>Australian Shepherd:  Put all the light bulbs in a little circle&#8230;<\/li>\n<li>Old English Sheep Dog:  Light bulb? Light bulb? That thing I just ate was a light bulb?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Golden Retriever: The sun is shining. The day is young. We&#8217;ve got our whole lives ahead of us. And you&#8217;re inside worrying about a stupid, burned-out light bulb? Border Collie: Just one. Not only that, but I&#8217;ll replace any wiring that&#8217;s not up to code. Dachshund: I can&#8217;t reach the lamp! Toy Poodle: I&#8217;ll just [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[19,33],"tags":[309,920],"class_list":["post-1564","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-dogs","category-light","tag-canine","tag-light-bulb"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1564","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1564"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1564\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1564"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1564"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1564"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}